Our First Community Outing with a Support Worker: A Diary Entry

Monday was a milestone for our family. Our first-ever community participation outing with a support worker. It was a rainy, grey afternoon, but inside Crocs Playcentre, the energy was anything but gloomy.

We were joined by Brayan, our new support worker, who came to help with Tobias (7). It was our first time navigating this kind of support, and while there were a few awkward moments, it was also incredibly enlightening.

The Reality of One Parent, Two Kids, and a Playcentre

Crocs is a favourite activity for our boys. But when only one parent is present, it’s not a feasible pastime. Both Tobias and Finneas need one-to-one support. Not just for safety, but for managing their unique ways of engaging with the world.

Finneas, for example, is a sweet boy but determined. If he’s climbing up a slide and another child is coming down, he’s not backing down and without eyes on him, it can easily go south. He's been known to step over other children or even bite when he is not given the grace to move in his planned direction. It’s not aggression. He simply can't use his words yet, as he is non-verbal. It’s just his way of sharing his intentions and saying, “I’m going up now.” However, it's not ideal, I never feel good if he's left too long and manages to hurt another child.

Where Finneas likes to explore perimeters and challenge the gravity of slides, Tobias could spend hours on the ride-on cars, which require payment. Without intervention, I’d be hundreds of dollars poorer by the end of the day.

While I kept eyes on Finneas, Brayan gave Tobias the attention he needed for the car rides. He facilitated joint car rides with another child and his parent which gave Tobias so much joy to take turns in driving with his new friend. When it was time to finish up with the cars Brayan helped Tobias manage expectations and gently coaxed him away towards the bouncy castle instead. That kind of support is invaluable. Not just practically, but emotionally. It is hard to help redirect Tobias, but if you offer up a second or third alternative, he usually is happy with that. 

Micro-Challenges and Big Lessons

There were so many small but powerful moments that reminded me why support workers are absolutely essential.

Take Finneas and the lollipops, for example. The café had already closed, and I hadn’t packed any backup treats (rookie mistake). Finny made a determined dash for the counter, eyes locked on the lollipop jar. Thankfully, the lovely staff member quietly tucked the jar out of sight, and I managed to gently redirect him to the bouncy castle.

Note to self: always pack a lollipop. Always.

Then there was the sock situation. Crocs requires everyone, both kids and adults, to wear socks at all times. But Finneas has sensory sensitivities and flat-out refuses to wear socks without shoes. He likes to feel the ground beneath his feet. I was so grateful that no one at the centre made a fuss. Finneas, standing in a line-up of kids, looks like any other five-year-old. I’m never quite sure how to phrase that. I don’t want to say he looks “normal,” but there’s nothing visibly different about him (save for his missing front teeth that he knocked out when he was three). His disability isn’t something you can see; it’s something you understand through his behaviours and interactions.

At one point, a couple of well-meaning kids on the bouncy castle tried to chat with him. I gently explained that Finny is non-verbal and can’t respond. One of the girls asked his age, and when I said “he’s five,” she replied, “Somebody needs to teach him to talk.” It was such a sweet and innocent comment, and I appreciated that she and her brother were still trying to include Finny in their play.

Invisible disabilities are hard to explain, especially to children. But I was so thankful for the quiet understanding from the staff, from the other kids, and from the space itself. This quiet agreement, as it were, allowed us to just be.

Gratitude and Growth

This outing was the first time we’ve done something like this after school. Usually, one of us does the pickup while the other works. Bills need paying, and life keeps moving. But thanks to our NDIS funding, we now have the support to do these activities, even if it's just once or twice a week.

I’m so grateful. Grateful for Brayan, for the playcentre staff, and for the chance to experience this kind of outing with my boys. It wasn’t perfect, it was pouring rain by the end, and I’d left the umbrella in the car. But it was an outing after school, for the first time (I think ever - I don't think we've ever done this). And it was fun! The biggest benefit of this outing was that I actually enjoyed it! I could focus on the time spent, instead of worrying about either of the boys.