🧠 Connecting the Dots: Understanding the Autistic Brain Through TCI, Sensory Processing, and Neurodevelopmental insights

As a parent of two autistic children, I’ve spent the last couple of years diving deep into the world of sensory development, brain science and more recently therapeutic models of support, —not just to learn, but to truly understand what’s going on beneath the surface of my boys’ behaviours and experiences.

Last week, I flew to NSW to learn Therapeutic Crisis Intervention (TCI) - and how to teach this cornerstone of care to our organisation. One concept that we learned about is the triune brain model. 

The triune brain model breaks the brain into three parts:

• Thinking Brain - The neocortex, where reasoning and learning happen.
• Emotional Brain - The limbic system, which governs and regulates emotions.
• Survival Brain - The reptilian brain, responsible for survival and instinct
  (Fight - Flight - Freeze - Fawn).

In moments of stress or dysregulation, our children often operate from the lower parts of the brain - Emotional and Survival. This means they’re not in a state where learning or reasoning is even possible. TCI teaches techniques and strategies on how to help them feel safe and regulated so they can access their “thinking brain".

One of our boys, Finneas, is non-verbal and communicates a lot of what he wants, needs and feels through his body—using gestures, movement, and presence to express his wants and needs. What’s both challenging and endearing about Finneas is that he often seems to live in his own world, gravitating toward the things he enjoys with deep focus and joy. 

Whether he’s at school or around other children, he’ll pursue what interests him—even if it means ignoring a request or reaching for something another child is using. To onlookers, this can be misunderstood as misbehaviour or a lack of discipline, but it’s not that at all. Finneas isn’t acting with malicious intent—he’s simply following his internal compass, and that’s part of what makes him so uniquely himself.

I’ve been working closely with our therapy team—our boys see a Speech Therapist and Occupational Therapist regularly. One of the tools our OT shared with me is the Pyramid of Learning, which shows how higher-level skills like communication and toileting depend on foundational sensory systems.

One of those foundational systems is interoception—the ability to sense internal body signals like hunger, thirst, or the need to go to the toilet. For autistic children, delays or differences in foundational sensory systems can make higher-level tasks like communication and toileting more complex. Supporting those foundational systems—through OT, sensory play, and emotional regulation—helps create the conditions where those higher-level skills can emerge and thrive.

And then there’s the hippocampus, a part of the brain involved in memory and emotional regulation. Research shows that autistic individuals often have differences in hippocampal structure and function, which can affect how they process routines, regulate emotions, and respond to stress.

So here I am, connecting the dots:

• TCI is helping me understand more how stress affects our children's ability to learn and process stress. 
• The Pyramid of Learning shows me why sensory foundations like interoception are essential for developing the ability to learn and communicate.
• Neurodevelopmental insights help me appreciate the unique ways my sons' brains process the world around them.

All of this comes together when I think about something as seemingly simple—but actually very complex—as toilet training. It’s not just about behaviour. It’s about emotional safety, sensory awareness, communication, and brain readiness.

I created a Venn diagram to help visualise how these concepts overlap. At the centre is toilet training—an integration of emotional regulation, sensory processing, and neurodevelopmental support.

This journey has helped me shift from asking “Why isn’t he getting it?” to “What does he need to feel safe, understood, and ready to learn?”