UPDATED: Misconceptions of Feminism - Why you mad mumma?
Some of the other events in recent times include the women’s marches March 2021 in protest of treatment of women across the world, abuse and unnecessary deaths of Indigenous women in custody due to lack of provision of proper medical treatment, and the #freeBritney campaign to have Britney Spears freed from a 13 year long conservatorship in which she does not have control over her own reproductive
system.
I’ve experienced the glass ceiling personally, many times in my life and I’m only 34, I’m white, and I’m not what people would consider disadvantaged in many ways.
I also know plenty of women, stuck in seemingly hopeless situations.
I also know men who actually are caring and loving and sympathetic.
So why speak up at all about this? Why bother? Why can't I just be happy about the lottery ticket I've ended up with in life?
Because there are still questions, because people are still choosing to ignore these systemic issues and Because there are many misconceptions about feminists that I believe need clearing up.
And also because I want to contribute, to continue the work that so many women have carried on before me.
My great aunt Barbara Holborow was a children’s court magistrate also known as 'the children's champion', a strong and caring woman who’s work helped many families in tough situations. But she was quoted saying this of her time working in the courts “they used to call us tea ladies” referring to the men who were back then still new to the idea that women could be anything more than a Secretary or “tea lady”.
So yes, I am a feminist, and if you want to clear up in your mind some of these misconceptions, please keep reading:
NOTE: These are my own personal viewpoints and not a complete expression of the way every single woman or feminist feels. If you want to know how a specific woman feels about these things, all you have to do is ask, but also listen 👂. Thank You 🙏
MYTH - Feminists hate all men
FALSE Feminists do not hate all men.
They just have a problem with men who mistreat, harm, financially, sexually, verbally and physically abuse women/men/children etc. Does a feminist have a problem with you, and how you treat the people in your life? No? Then you must be doing the right thing, thank you 🙏
MYTH - Feminists just want all women to work and men to stay home and change poopy diapers
FALSE Many feminists are/ or know someone who is a stay at home mum trapped in abusive situations they can’t escape because they have no control over their finances because their partner wouldn’t allow them to earn an income of their own. This is why many more women do not have superannuation and die in poverty in comparison to men.
All we ask for is equality and safety for women. And an equal share of poopy diaper changes as this task should not be viewed as a woman’s only job OR seen as a task beneath someone’s capabilities to do so.
MYTH - Feminists want to cut off men’s dicks
FALSE Maybe there are some men who should not have become fathers, but feminists are just tired of being rehab for dysfunctional men and their problems.
Often women do unpaid emotional labour and are left worse off because men who become dads do not think that the child that has been brought into this world is equally their responsibility. If you don’t want to become a father, don’t have sex. Because even if you’re having protected sex, protection is never 100% guaranteed to work. So even if there is an accident, it is still equally mans responsibility.
MYTH - Feminists are slutty
FALSE Sexuality and sexual expression should not label a woman as slutty. A man sleeps around, is seen as having “sexual conquests”. Feminists can wear a hijab OR wear next to nothing (aka a bikini at a beach), but they still have the right to bodily autonomy.
QUESTION What is Bodily autonomy?
ANSWER It’s the right to decisions over ones own body without external influence or coercion. Many women, trans and non-binary are dictated what to wear, what’s appropriate for their gender, what’s appropriate for their age, race, religion.
FACT: A woman is not “asking for it” no matter what she is wearing.
FACT: A woman is not “asking for it” if she is intoxicated.
FACT: A woman is not “asking for it” if she is walking home alone
FACT: A woman is not “asking for it”. Period.
MYTH - There are bad women out there too, why just hate on men?
TRUTH Feminists don’t disagree with this. Both men and women can be oppressed and oppressors and this has been going on for generations of systematic oppression.
In order to affect change, where change needs to be affected we are better off supporting one another than we are bickering. Part of the problem is that due to the patriarchal system that society has in place and continues to be governed by to this day (please read up on this, if you disagree that there is such a thing - there is so much information on this - some sources listed at the bottom of this post), women are often turned on one another.
Instead of building each other up, we are conditioned to fear and condemn our sisters.
This is changing though. There are finally more safe spaces to report abuse without threatening fear of safety or job loss, but there is still a long way to go.
MYTH - Women are being paid better now
TRUTH In 2020/2021 women who work full-time (this is important to note) still only earn 82cents for every dollar a man earns and are more likely to be employed casually (without benefits) or part-time.
In Australia in 2020 the full-time with benefits gap was 20.1% which is down from where it has been in the past. But most studies indicate that it would take another 25 years for this gap to reach 0% if that is at all attainable and not counting for set-backs in light of the pandemic which we still don’t have data on since October 2020.
Women stuck in domestic abuse situations have been forced to stay put, with many shelters and safe havens closing or having limited capacity due to Covid.
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So now you have some insight. Hope you found the read somewhat useful and if you have more questions seek out more information using something like “duck duck go”, or “Bing” or I don’t know, “Google”?
In case you don’t know what to look for, here are several sources that I have visited to find information that I have used to compose this article:
https://www.abc.net.au/news/2020-03-31/urgent-action-needed-over-indigenous-women-in-jails/12103372
Britney Spears asks for accountant to replace father as conservator | Britney Spears | The Guardian
Timeline of dress codes: History of men telling women what to wear
https://www.abc.net.au/local/stories/2012/05/23/3509316.htm
https://chicagounbound.uchicago.edu/cgi/viewcontent.cgi?article=1266&context=uclf
Oppressed and Oppressors? The Systematic Mistreatment of Men on JSTOR
https://www.payscale.com/data/gender-pay-gap
Over a quarter of a century until gender pay gap likely to close | WGEA
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